The Ten Commandments OF Singing

It is a historical fact that the original tablets Moses brought down with the written word of god that he broke on the ground at the sight of the golden calf were initially instructions on how to sing properly.  He went back up, because he was pissed off, and wrote social laws for his people to obey because the ancient Hebrews couldn’t just have faith, and sing together.  The following is what was pieced together of the broken tablets and locked away in vaults from society because they were forbidden the privilege of singing like an angel until they got their ethics down first (and we still seem to be working on that).

moses

1. Thou Shalt Not Covet Thy Neighbors Voice Or Style -They will always do it better than you so be yourself!
2. Thou Shalt Not Use Chest Voice Were it Doesn’t Belong -If you try to sing high notes with your chest voice you will strain and shout and your voice might crack mid-performance.
3. Thou Shalt Not Bear Falsetto To Thy Neighbor’s Ear -Use Head Voice and Mix.  Falsetto can add a flavor…sometimes. It is a weak sound production overall, and gets lost in a live performance.
4. Remember The Bridge; Modify Thy Vowels To Keep Thy Balance -Narrowing releases upwards in register, and widening releases downwards.
5. Honor Thy Vocal Health And Body -Eat right, sleep right, warm up your voice regularly, and give it rest when it is tired. One can’t stress the importance of this commandment enough!
6. Thou Shalt Not Exceedingly Auto-Tune -Everyone can save expensive studio time fixing a note or two in a recorded performance.  However if you are auto-tuning more than 10% of the time, you are basically lying. Go home and work on yo’ skillz!
7. Thou Shalt Not Allow Your Band-mates To Be Louder In The Monitors Than Your Voice -Even if you are the guitarist with your amp louder than your voice, you are going to find your voice tiring out to keep up, because when you can’t hear your voice in the mixing board, you sing louder.  A string can break and be replaced, but a hemorrhaged voice needs surgery.
8. Thou Shalt Not Go On Tour Without Technique Training From A Bridging Expert – Sam Smith, Adele and many others are examples of musicians canceling tours and needing medical surgery from vocal damage.  Just because you sing well doesn’t mean you have the tools to survive the rigors of a tour as a professional vocalist.  You are expected to use your voice on and off the stage, and can also be seduced by the party.  If you don’t have your health and technique down pat, you simply wont make it through, or worse.
9. Thou Shalt Not Hold Back -You cannot sing apologetically, or in non-committal manor because you are heard either way.  Sing out!
10. Thou Shalt Not Perform Screamo…..Ever….No One Wants To Hear That Crap = ‘Nuff said.

Somehow, the Lord had a lot of foreknowledge of the technology, situations, and musical genres of the future!

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